Not to brag, but I am kind of a rockstar. My whole life I’ve heard compliments from dentists. No cavities, easy cleaning. I know, I know. You’re jealous, right? 😉😂
But there’s a downfall to this fame.
After 40 years of brushing, I’m recovering from gum grafting surgery. I brushed SO diligently for SO long that I literally wore away my gums in two spots. (Don’t push hard when you brush!!) Who knew it’s possible to be TOO good?
Sometimes when we think we’re doing the RIGHT thing, we end up harming ourselves.
You’re good at things too. That’s part of the reason you dive in when things aren’t going well with your kids (or anything for that matter). You want to figure it out. Make things better. Solve the problem. Get results.
Research shows that smart women are extremely good at making the best of any situation, which can limit their ambition, success, and even happiness. You’re sometimes TOO good at adapting to social norms and expectations. (Smart Girls in the 21st Century, Kerr & McKay)
You make the BEST lemonade, but it sours after a while.
Our society (the US, but really everywhere) relies on moms (and women) to manage most of the social, emotional, care-related aspects of life. A lot of that work is emotional, invisible labor that no one else sees. At work, at home, at school. You pick up the slack, and you are a rockstar at it. But is that holding you back from tending to your own needs and personal aspirations?
Everyone enjoys the benefits of your smile, your lemonade without seeing it’s impact on you.
The pandemic brought this issue to the forefront, but nothing’s been done about it. Unfortunately, it’s up to you to make changes in your own life. The more you speak up about what you need, and make choices that signal the value of your own wellbeing and work, the more it inspires others to do the same. (Including your children, by the way.)
That doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. Or that you have to do it at all, actually. But, if you’re sensing that it’s time for you to break the expected rules a little, I’m here for you. Working with me doesn’t mean that you quit your life and dash away to Mexico for early retirement.
It does mean you devote some of that rockstar energy to your own wellbeing and dreams.
Let me know if you’re ready.
And don’t push too hard when you brush.
Hey! I'm Cara Maclean, M. A., a Wellness Coach who helps moms like you undo what keeps them exhausted and overwhelmed. Together we cultivate the calm, joyful energy you crave, so you can handle any challenge with humor and grace. I'm also author of Just the Way It Is: A Look at Gender and Generations in Gifted/2e Families, Spring 2022, through GHF Press.
If you're curious about coaching, you can sign up for a free 30 minute consult call here!