Right now the world is home. Most of us, unless we are essential workers or healthcare professionals, spend our days with family, away from friends and loved ones, trying with all our might not to lose it.
You’re doing a good job.
Whatever your situation – from survival mode after having lost jobs or income, to fear about your or someone else’s health, to having things be mostly the same as normal life normal life – what you are doing is enough.
There is no right way to weather this storm. We understand this intellectually, but our cultural narrative speaks back: “You could write your book! The kids could learn Spanish! You could build that treehouse in your backyard.”
The need to be always doing, improving, and going, going, going fuels the belief that you’re not enough.
You are enough.
If anything good comes out of this time – and trust me, I hope there are a lot of structural and systemic changes that come – but in each of our families, I hope that presence returns.
Presence is truly being with someone. Even yourself. Especially yourself. Valuing the moment for what it is, not what it was supposed to be, or could’ve been. Giving attention to what matters most when the portal of information and media lures you elsewhere.
What matters most is you. Your family. Your relationships.
Be present with how you feel, how your children feel, and honor that whatever the feelings. Allow yourselves to play and be supremely unproductive. Enjoy the moments where you can find them.
Be grateful for the little things. There are sweet moments in the chaos of small children. There are also moments where you’ll doubt yourself and your ability to raise fully functioning humans. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re holding it all, at once, and there’s 100% chance something’s got to slip. That’s ok.
You are doing a good job.
Check in with YOU. What matters most to you? What goodness surrounds you? How can you steal away time for yourself? What can you let go? Where can you create small moments of presence and calm?
If you are with your children (or anyone for that matter), be truly WITH them. Appreciate what they bring to your life. Listen to their stories however long it takes to come around to an ending. There may never be an ending. Give in to the sweetness of a little brain full of ideas that wants so badly to express and be heard.
Let them know the world needs what they have to say. Listen. Full focus.
And know, too, that the world needs what YOU have to say. Your story matters. Listen to your heart as well, as you guide your children to honor theirs. It’s always time well spent. Too often we let things go because there’s not enough time for it all, especially now.
Carve out space. Foster enthusiasm.
Be present. Allow all the feels.
It teaches them they are worthy. You are worthy. And from there you change the world one breath at a time.